Find Relationship Happiness

Do you miss the closeness, ease and excitement that you once shared?

• As distance and conflict grow between you, do you feel lonely and unappreciated?
• Are you tired of cycling through the same frustrating arguments without resolution?
• Are you worried that your relationship will end, or that it will always be unhappy?
• Do you wish you could renew the intimacy and connection?

You can reconnect.

Like many in Charlotte, you and your partner might have busy lives; with careers, families and other obligations that leave you feeling stressed and drained. After a hectic day, all you want is to feel recognized, understood and supported by the person you love.

Instead, you feel like your relationship is stuck in conflict, disconnection or both. As time goes on, you might wonder if it’s possible to build the nourishing relationship that you crave or once shared. You may feel isolated and overwhelmed, especially if it feels like you and your partner aren’t on the same team.

As human beings, we are wired to connect. We find strength in feeling seen, heard and valued. And we find joy in offering that same care to someone else.

However, that doesn’t mean connection is easy. Few of us had good models of what it means to have a loving, secure relationship. We don’t always know how to be open and honest. And, it can be tough to maintain healthy boundaries and healthy intimacy.

We’re also prone to comparing ourselves to others. It’s common to scroll through social media or watch romance play out on the big screen, wondering why you can’t have what seems to come so easily for everyone else. You might worry that there’s something wrong with you, or something wrong with your partner.

Relationship issues are nothing to be ashamed of. The images captured in mainstream and social media only tell part of the story. In reality, you and your partner are far from alone.

Your relationship can and should be a source of comfort and support.

How I Can Help

A skilled, experienced relationship therapist can help you and your partner reduce the hard moments in your relationship and learn how to navigate the bumps. You can move forward together, as your best, most authentic selves.

You will be provided with a supportive and confidential space, nonjudgmental warmth and compassion, training and expertise in relationships, and practical tools to build communication skills.

Therapy provides an opportunity to slow conflict down. I can help you notice when you are turning away from one another or when an argument is heating to its boiling point.

I am trained in Gottman Method which is a method of therapy meant to improve relationships between couples. While the Gottman Method is known most notably to focus on interactions within marital relationships, it is also meant to increase communication and positive bonds between parents and their children. My training in Gottman Method will help you make sense of the drama, the emotional circus, to have a map and a way home.

Additionally, I am trained in Acceptance & Commitment Therapy (ACT) which is focuses on building relationship skills to help partners to be more aware, present and engaged with themselves and their partner. This way, partners are much less likely to react to negative thoughts and feelings with words, actions and behaviors which cause hurt and harm. My training in ACT can help you feel distant from each other and find the path to reconnection.

Common Concerns

“Do we really need therapy? Can’t we just figure it out on our own?”

You’ve probably already tried everything you can think of to make it better. That’s okay. There’s no shame in struggling to figure it out on your own. When you’re caught in the cycle of relationship conflict, it can be extremely difficult to see what’s really going on. It can seem impossible to find a way out.

“We don’t have time for couples therapy.”

Especially here in Charlotte, the demands of commutes, jobs, family obligations and more can make carving out time for your relationship difficult. You might feel like you just don’t have any time or energy to spare.

However, consider how much time and energy relationship conflict is eating up. When you and your partner are clashing, it can be hard to show up as your best self.

When a relationship is working well, it can serve as a foundation for the rest of your life. It can offer you a sense of security and safety—a space to rest and renew.

“What if my partner won’t come to therapy?”

You can’t change your partner, and you can’t force them to come to therapy. You only have control over yourself.

That said, a relationship is a dynamic system. While it’s ideal to have both partners in sessions, you can shift the system on your own.

Therapy can help you recognize the patterns at play in your relationship and identify ways to change unhelpful words and behaviors. Once you start to make positive changes, your relationship is likely to grow in response.